Life? or no life?

Okay, the conversation went like this, or more rather:-
Me :"Im gonna update my blog as soon as my internet is back to normal."
Yw :"Kononnya..."

Hell, what an answer, but if there wasn't for this answer, I wouldn't be sitting here and updating my half dead blog *choi*. hmm, it have been? almost a month since I've last touched my blog. Argh, when i first open my blog today, I felt like a total stranger. A stanger to this blog, weird. It had no longer have the feeling that I've known it for life. The feeling is just plain weird.

Another question, what have i done of late? the answer is simple actually, I have done everything and nothing. I'm just SO TIRED. I need to breathe, I havent been relaxing for AGES, physically and mentally. I'm in desperate need of DE-stress. I'm so tired. I cant control my temper, the bubble in me could break anytime. Gahh. i miss my old self. I'm here now, still unsure of how to fully express myself. On how much I hate my new life. *okay, i should stop*

And by the way, I'm not so sure about the definition of an emo blog. But from my common sense, I've concluded that and emo blog is not good? As in:
1) no one will bother to finish reading it
2) Makes everybody's life as miserable as yours
3) ITS BORING *no offence though*

Actually, the main reason behind my absence is the exams, the homework, and the projects piling up on my head. It kinda makes my head heavier, and a bigger big head. Okay, first thing first, the exams. I flunked everything *full stop*. I hate myself, I regreted for having myself still in honeymoon year. And I truly understand on how much effort must I work on for the next exam. *which is on 27/5 btw*. I hate my results and I don't think there's any point showing it up here. It'll just upset me more.

And my class, the people are smart? nope, they're nt sjust smart, they're INSANELY smart. I terribly miss my 3A6. At least, ther atmophere there isn't as tense. I mean, no offence BUT. These people are highly INSANE. Form 4 still can score 90+? i mean, as in 99?? gawd. I think I'm gonna faint. I cant even scrape by 80 and these people can get 99?! I felt so stupid, dumb, and useless. All i can do now is wrok hard, iish

Homework? projects? I've finished all pjk, moral, and chemistry thingie. Finally, I can breathe. *I say things as if I'm barely alive XD* Well, actually, I finished all these projects in 3 days? yupps, its down to 1 day per project, nice? Haha, I'm quite proud of myself. I love it when things are done, I felt so ever accomplished. However, I still have alot of homeworks to do =.=".

By the way, I'm going off to Port dickson this week. With PMO, thats the good news, ready for the bad news? That stupid Pn chua is going. Wtf, I dont normally curse a teacher this badly, but i'll make this an exception. I solemnly say that : Damn u pn chua, Why do you have to ruin my trip?! hell, Its bad enough for you to be my form teacher. But with you as guru penasihat?! 2 words: Gone case. Hell, I really hate you. I accept if you scold me if i don't do my work. But you scold me for asking a question?! Hell, i hate you. You and your stupid duck voice!! ghhaah, enough of this, enough of her. I can barely think of polluting my blog with her presence.

And there's this PMO camp =D, but it clashes with my treasure hunt. T.T Awww, I think i'll keep the treasure hunt for next time. iish, i can't wait for the camp, sounds fun. for me XD. Come to think of it, I've just realised that I've already Form 4. which leaves me 1 more year till graduation. SO FAST? that my secondary school days are going to be over. I've always pictured that form 4 and 5 are the seniors in the .. um school. And I cant believe that I'm one of them now. Gee, sounds old XD. It seems just like yesterday when I 1st left primary school, and just as blur. I do wish that I could grow more MENTALLY. Argh, my mentality seems to be stuck. =.=

Hmmm, That should be enough for today. At least i think so, till next time haha.